stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Randomize
