TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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