But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Randomize
