Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize