Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
