let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Randomize
