So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
