Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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