after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
