sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Drunk is a universal language darling
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
