I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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