I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
