On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
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