at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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