Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
