lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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