do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
