i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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