the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
my being single is dangerous.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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