nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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