Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
