but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize