: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Randomize
