I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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