Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
