I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
You smell like stripper and shame
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
