you're like a bully in the Christmas story
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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