If i come over, it means nothing
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
