Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
