Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
