sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
