marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
the day after is always just damage control
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
