fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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