Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Randomize
