Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
