I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Randomize
