If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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