You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Randomize
