How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Every concussion has its silver lining
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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