"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
It's blow job season.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
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