Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
