I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
