Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
