So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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