I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
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