yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Randomize
