when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
this boner is exhausting
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
