Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
She needs sedatives and a leash
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Randomize
