Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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