I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
